True Emotions
by mer007
Summary: These are the X-files you've never seen, or expected. Mulder and Scully true emotions are revealed when they hold NOTHING BACK.
1. Sweet Valentine

True Emotions  
Ch.1  
Sweet Valentine  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own the X-files.  
  
Author's Note: Valentine's Day is coming fast and I'm dreaming of love. So here ya go! It's set in the seventh season.  
  
8:23am February 14th FBI Headquarters Washington, D.C.  
  
Scully was working busily in Mulder's office researching their case when Mulder walked into the room. He was nearly an hour and a half late. Scully looked up as he approached her. She had tired eyes and an aggravated expression. She had been up all night thinking about this and that.  
  
Mulder had his hands behind his back and a wide smile on his face. Scully just started with him, "Where have you been Mulder?! I've been here since six, you were supposed to get here and help me look up some information on this case!"  
  
Her harsh voice didn't wipe away his smile as he said, "I have something for you. It's why I was late."  
  
But Scully wasn't listening she just went on, "Oh never mind. I did that autopsy for you. Here are the results." She shoved them at him but he couldn't take them. "Fine then Mulder, if you don't feel like doing work then I'll just leave I got a lot of things to do."  
  
"Wait no! What do have to do?" he said disappointedly.  
  
"Oh I don't know. a couple more autopsies, that background check on the Williams guy, and all the other busy work you ask me to do!" she said angrily.  
  
"You don't have to do that, it can wait." he said.  
  
"IT CAN WAIT! I wish you would have told me that BEFORE you had me up all last night!" she yelled at him as she slammed the autopsy results on the desk.  
  
"Scully.I . don't be angry." he said sweetly, "I got something for you."  
  
But Scully wasn't listening she walked out the room and nearly ran Skinner over. "Agent Scully we need to have a word."  
  
"I can't!" she said shortly as she walked past him quickly.  
  
Skinner walked into the office and looked at Mulder. "What's wrong with Agent Scully?"  
  
Mulder tried to smile at him as he set down a bouquet of flowers and a box of candy on the desk as he said, "I don't know. bad night I guess.. I've got to go, do you mind if I take the rest of the day off?"  
  
"Yes you've got a big case open here Muld-"he said but was interrupted.  
  
"Thanks.got to go." Mulder said as he walked out the door.  
  
"No one listens to me!" Skinner said to himself angrily.  
  
* * * * * * * * * *  
  
Scully looked angrily at her reflection in the bathroom mirror. Why had she been so rude to Mulder? "I was just sick of all this work!" she said out loud. But really she had no clue why she was so angry at him. She wouldn't even admit to herself the truth, that she just wanted his attention. She was acting just like a little girl, doing whatever she could to catch his eye.  
  
But even as this thought went through her brain she wouldn't believe it. She wouldn't believe that this silly thing came from her desire for him, because she loved him. She shook her head, straightened her hair with her fingers and turned and walked out of the restroom.  
  
When she got back to Mulder's office he was gone, and so was Skinner. She looked around solemnly at the empty room. But it wasn't empty. She walked up to the desk and smiled as she saw the flowers and candy. She opened the note next to it:  
  
"Sorry you don't feel so well today. Hope your day turns out better. These are for you. Happy Valentine's Day. -Mulder."  
  
"Scully you idiot!" she said to herself. She had forgotten that it was Valentine's Day! He was late because he was getting her a present. She hated herself even more now.  
  
She grabbed her coat, the flowers and the candy and walked out of the room. She completely ignored Skinner when he met her in the elevator and she walked out to her car.  
  
* * * * * * * * * *  
  
By 6:30pm she hadn't found him. He wasn't at his apartment or anywhere else she checked. By now the flowers were wilted and she was exhausted. She finally decided to go home.  
  
She unlocked the door and dropped her stuff on the table as she flicked the light on. Then she screamed and nearly had her gun out as she saw someone sitting on her coach.  
  
"Scully?" Mulder said as he awoke.  
  
Scully looked at him surprised, "Mulder what are you doing here? I've been looking for you everywhere!"  
  
"Really by the way you acted this morning I would have sworn you wouldn't care if I left forever!" he said with a tiny hint of sarcasm.  
  
"Mulder I'm sorry." She said as she looked around, there were Valentine's decorations. "Mulder did you do all this?"  
  
"Yeah," he said laughing "I was going to surprise you but I fell asleep. I didn't sleep well last night. I left a bunch of messages on your cell phone to tell you you could forget about the autopsy."  
  
Scully took out her cell phone and it read "Four missed calls." "Oh, I had my cell phone off. I'm sorry, but why did you want me to forget it?"  
  
He stood up and walked towards her "Did you forget what day it is?"  
  
She smiled with her usual playful smile, "I guess I just needed a reminder."  
  
He smiled as he looked into her eyes. Scully shifted nervously, what was he doing so close to her? He touched her face softly, "Now there's the smile that I was looking for this morning."  
  
Scully's heart beat quickened, he was acting so strange. "Mulder what-"  
  
"Shhhh." He said quietly, "I guess cupid's hit me bad."  
  
"Mulder don't-we should-"  
  
But he didn't stop. As he got closer and closer she could resist less and less. As he touched his lips to hers she wrapped her arms around him. Kissing him felt so right. It was like she was drinking his sweet taste. Finally getting what she had dared to want. He ran his fingers through her fiery orange hair.  
  
For a long while Scully just stood in his arms with her eyes closed. She didn't want to wake up and find that it was all a dream. But when she finally did open them she looked into his eyes, he was still there. "I wilted the flowers." She said sadly.  
  
Mulder laughed joyfully, he didn't care. 


	2. DayDreaming

True Emotions  
Ch.2  
Day-dreaming  
  
Scully for one of the few times in her life was bored out of her mind. This came rarely to a woman of her intelligence. She often had busy work to do, or some autopsy for some case. In fact the cases were the things that made her life so interesting. Aliens, flying saucers, mysterious characters, contagious diseases and the threat of death usually filled every minute of her life with a rush of adrenaline.  
  
But today for once it was a perfectly normal, if there really is such a thing, no-nonsense day. Scully could barely stand it. She looked up from her paper work to see Mulder spinning slightly in his chair behind his desk. He was staring at the pencils he had thrown into the ceiling. Scully stifled a laugh when one of them dropped on his head.  
  
"Mulder what the hell are we doing here today?" Scully said frustrated.  
  
Mulder jolted in his seat seemingly shocked when there was a sound in the room. It had been silent in the room for nearly half and hour. So silent in fact that the tick-tock of the clock on the wall was nearly giving him a headache. He just gave a long sigh and stood up and went to the filing cabinet.  
  
"Mulder... this is the first time in nearly two years that we've had a spare minute. For once you haven't found a flying saucer, or a strange disappearance or even a talking a cow for us to chase around!" she ended with a laugh.  
  
He smiled silently but still no response. He wasn't used to this at all. "Mulder what are we doing here? It's a gorgeous day, look at the sun shinning! I want to get the heck out of this basement and ... I don't know ... take a walk. Why are you so silent today?"  
  
But Mulder didn't want to say anything because he knew nothing he could say could explain why he didn't want her to go. He himself wasn't quite sure exactly but this was the first time in a long while that they had spent alone together. He had actually found himself staring at her at times, but whenever she looked up he would look away, usually up at the ceiling. He felt very childish for it but he liked it when it made her laugh.  
  
For a while Scully was happy that things had slowed down, that for once, for this week or so, she was leading a normal life. But this was just plain ridiculous! She was starting to get the distinct feeling that Mulder was keeping her here on purpose.  
  
"Scully..." he started as he turned around to look at her.  
  
"Yes?"  
  
"It is a beautiful day!" he said "I can't expect to hold you in here all day."  
  
Scully got suspicious when a smile spread across his face. "Mulder you know that Skinner's going to find some more paper work for me... and he wouldn't stand it if we ran out on him again." she said remembering Valentine's Day with a smile.  
  
"Yeah." Mulder laughed. "But what he doesn't know won't hurt him."  
  
Scully was shocked Mulder had been acting very strange lately. Ever since Valentine 's Day he had been acting really playful. This both scared and delighted her. But Scully couldn't resist his smile, or the chance of getting out of this room.  
  
"Did you have anything planned for tonight?" Mulder asked.  
  
"Mulder? What the...?" Scully said shocked, "Are you asking me out on a date, Mulder?"  
  
"No..." he said with a smile, "But I heard about this talking cow in the park...I think we should investigate immediately."  
  
Scully could barely hold back her laughter, "Mulder!.....Well I guess your right!"  
  
* * * * *  
  
"Isn't it strange to actually have free time." Mulder said as they walked in the sunny park.  
  
"Well technically we're playing hooky here Mulder." Scully said looking up at him with a smile.  
  
"Well it's well deserved wouldn't you say? Besides it's a holiday."  
  
"Great what holiday did I forget this time?" Scully said sarcastically.  
  
"Scully!" Mulder said in an astonished voice when he stopped and looked directly at her "Have you forgotten that it's the first day of spring?!"  
  
"It must be all the love in the air that is clogging my brain!" she said with surprising enthusiasm.  
  
"Well maybe that's what's been making me want to do this..." Mulder said in a very different voice as he leaned down to her.  
  
But surprisingly Scully was way ahead of him and she put her hand on his face and kissed his sweet lips. And so completely taken over by the spring's effects they shared a long and pleasant kiss.  
  
"I love the spring." Scully whispered to him.  
  
"I love you." Mulder said in response. 


	3. With Love Comes Pain

True Emotions  
Ch.3  
With Love Comes Pain  
  
"I love you." The most wonderful words that ever slipped from his lips, but yet the words that pierced her heart like the cold blade of a dagger.  
  
In that one moment the entire world disappeared into a heavenly existence, the moment his lips touched hers. Nothing, not wining a million dollars, not a vacation in Hawaii, could beat the way she felt in his arms that day in the park last week. But when he said those words she not only filled with shock but fear, for she knew she loved him too.  
  
It was the kind of fear that she was begging for, an utter excitement, an adrenaline rush, but it was also a fear of what may be to come. Would this wonderful emotion last forever, or would it simply slip away when the summer sun set? These were the questions that ran through her mind as Scully sat in the passenger's seat of the car staring out the window.  
  
Mulder and Scully were out to Pennsylvania for a new case. Scully hadn't been listening to much that Mulder had said back at the office. She only smiled up at him while she starred into his eyes. Mulder had been too distracted pointing to slides to even notice that for the first time in his life Scully's complete attention was on him, or that it was on HIM not what he was saying.  
  
But Scully was very frustrated at the moment. All morning he had been blabbering about vampires and all that and had seemed to totally forget that afternoon in the park last Tuesday. She could hardly believe how much she wanted him to just shut up and kiss her. "No Scully!" she kept thinking as she shook her head, "We have to keep our relationship completely professional!"  
  
Once again Scully did this and for the first time in an hour and a half Mulder spoke up, "Are you okay Scully? You've been really quiet today."  
  
"Um...I'm fine...but I—"Scully said as she decided whether or not to bring it up.  
  
"Yes?..." Mulder said urging her to continue.  
  
"Well about last Tuesday in the park... Well I just thought it would be best if we...well if we just keep our relationship professional."  
  
"Oh...okay then." he said trying to sound optimistic.  
  
"Okay..." Scully said with a nod of her head and then looked out the window.  
  
Mulder shifted his position and his hands on the wheel, pretending again not to mind. For the rest of the trip they said nothing at all. Mulder looked back at her every so often to check her response to the conversation, but other than that the rest of the trip was uneventful until they were nearly there.  
  
It was getting late and Mulder had been driving for nearly four hours, for a moment his eyes slipped closed and the car noisily went over the rumble strip. "Mulder why don't we switch, you've been driving the whole time?" Scully asked.  
  
"No...I'm fine, besides we're almost there." He said.  
  
Scully said nothing more until it happened again, and they went a little farther off the highway, nearly into the grass. "Mulder! Get back on the road!" Scully yelled as she tapped him on the shoulder.  
  
"I'm on the road!" he yelled as soon as he had repositioned the car.  
  
"No you weren't!" she yelled back "Just let me drive Mulder!"  
  
"No! We're almost there it's just inconvenient!" he continued to yell.  
  
"It's inconvenient to drive off the road into a ditch and get killed also!" she also continued yelling.  
  
"Shut up! You just made us miss our exit!" Mulder screamed.  
  
"I made us miss the exit! You're the one with your eyes closed!"  
  
"Damn it Woman!"  
  
"What the hell did you just call me?!"  
  
* * * * *  
  
One hour later  
  
"Just get the hell out of the car!" Mulder screamed at Scully through the windshield as he stood in the motel parking lot.  
  
"Don't tell me we're spending the night in this dump! What are you cheep! They probably have rats the size of cows in this piece of shit they call a motel!"  
  
"So you choose now of all times to get a since of humor!"  
  
"Don't get smart with me mister!" Scully screamed as she got out of the car.  
  
"You sound like my damn mother!"  
  
"I do not!"  
  
"Scully I'm not yelling at you all night!..." he lowered his voice as a person came out of the main lobby, "Let's just get some rooms."  
  
"Okay! Fine! Whatever!"  
  
They walked into the main lobby and up to the dirty front desk. "TWO rooms, please." Mulder said with an emphasis on the two.  
  
"Married?" the smoking lady said at behind the desk.  
  
"NO!" both Mulder and Scully said as they looked angrily at each other and grabbed the keys.  
  
* * * * *  
  
12:56am (1/2 hour later)  
  
Suddenly Scully was awoken by gunshots from down the hall. Scully flicked on the light, pulled her gun from it's holster and climbed out of bed and unlocked the door. She quickly made it down the hall where a bunch of people were surrounding a body. Before she could make it through the small crowd she heard them talking.  
  
"It's an FBI man!" one said.  
  
"Are you a cop?" another asked, "This guys from the FBI, see this is his badge."  
  
Scully's heart dropped.  
  
"Everybody clear out!" Scully could hear from behind her. "This man is not an FBI agent, I am.... just go back to your rooms so my partner and I can straighten this out."  
  
* * * * *  
  
"Thank God, Mulder!" Scully said as soon as she and Mulder had stepped aside, and she threw her arms around him and continued, "I thought that he was you for a moment."  
  
For a moment he said nothing, just in shock at the sudden embrace. Then he questioned, "What is this? I thought you said you wanted to keep things strictly professional?"  
  
"Why are you being so critical?"  
  
"Well we just spent a whole hour screaming our lungs out at each and now you're all lovey-dovey with me!"  
  
"What—I'm not being lovey-dovey with you!" Scully said trying not to raise her voice again.  
  
"Why the hell do you have to act this way?!"  
  
"Act what way?!"  
  
"Like a little child!"  
  
"I—"she paused and put a hand to her head, this was giving her a headache, "Just—"a hot tear ran down her face, 'Why the hell am I crying?!'  
  
Mulder's voice changed dramatically, "Scully I didn't mean to...I'm sorry... we've both been acting like little children."  
  
"I know—I just can't do this!"  
  
"What can't you do?"  
  
"Look at you without—"  
  
"What?" he said hoping for the right answer.  
  
"Without—never mind! We can't do this!"  
  
"Who says we can't?"  
  
"I do...I don't want to."  
  
"You don't want to do what? This?" he said as he grabbed her and kiss her sweet lips and ran his hands through her hair.  
  
After a moment she paused, "Yes...but I was thinking a little more like this." She said as she gave him a devilish look and kissed him back and wrapped her arms around him. "I love you too Mulder." She whispered in his ear.  
  
"I've been waiting for you to say that." He smiled before he gave her one more kiss.  
  
TO BE CONTINUED  
  
I love this one! 


	4. In a Heartbeat

True Emotions  
Ch.4  
In a Heartbeat  
  
"She answered my call when I was lost in the darkness, She was there for me when the tears were like my very blood, She was here and gone in a heartbeat.  
  
"She was the one who made me whole, She was the one who kept me honest, She was the one my heart beat for.  
  
"But she has slipped away, Her grip on me slipped with her fading breath, A silence came over her with the stopping of her heartbeat.  
  
"In a moment the beauty of her eyes, In a second the life in her soul, In a heartbeat all she was, was gone.  
  
"In a heartbeat my beloved was gone..." Mulder said with cold tears running down his face as he read the poem aloud. The group of mourners around him stood solemnly looking down at the coffin about to be put in the ground. Mulder's knees were weak as he bent down to put a single rose atop the coffin.  
  
"Mulder..." a voice said behind him as they placed a comforting hand on his shoulder.  
  
"Why would she kill herself? It just doesn't make sense!" Mulder said as he grabbed the woman's hand on his shoulder meekly.  
  
He turned around to see Scully crying slightly too, as well as a comforting smile on her face. "Mulder..." she said again as she gently put her arms around him, "I know it's hard to understand Mulder...but I just..."  
  
Mulder only stepped away from her, nothing could comfort him from his sorrow. He turned around to look at the gravestone, it read "Dana Katherine Scully." Scully's image behind him faded as he looked back at her.  
  
"Are you okay Mulder?" Skinner asked worriedly.  
  
"I can still see her..." he said tears flowing down his cheeks "She standing there, watching me...she's smiling."  
  
"You're not serious Mulder are you? Maybe you should get home, I'll drive you."  
  
"NO!" Mulder suddenly said breaking down "Scully don't go!"  
  
TO BE CONTINUED 


	5. Open Your Eyes

True Emotions  
Ch.5  
Open Your Eyes  
  
"I can still see her..." he said tears flowing down his cheeks "She standing there, watching me...she's smiling."  
  
"You're not serious Mulder are you? Maybe you should get home, I'll drive you."  
  
"NO!" Mulder suddenly said breaking down "Scully don't go!"  
  
*****  
  
"Mulder wake up!" Scully said as she shook him awake. "It's okay..."  
  
Mulder opened his eyes, and looked into Scully's gorgeous face. He looked around he was in Scully's living room, on the couch. The fear was still evident in his face.  
  
"That must have been one terrible nightmare Mulder..." Scully said smiling comfortingly as she wiped the tears off his face.  
  
"What am I doing here?" Mulder asked her dazed.  
  
"You fell asleep here after work last night. I went into my bedroom to get the autopsy files and when I came back you were asleep here on the couch."  
  
"What?" he said confused "What time is it?"  
  
"It's nearly 6:30 you better get up you've still got to go back to your place. You're going to be late if you don't hurry up." Scully smiled at him as she handed him the autopsy files.  
  
Mulder looked at her for a moment, the memories of the dream still floating around his head. He looked at his watch then said, "I'll just have to go in this."  
  
"Okay..." Scully said looking at his wrinkled clothes.  
  
"Well you could have woken me up sooner if you didn't want me looking terrible at the office." Mulder said surprising even himself with his grumpy tone.  
  
Scully put a hand on either side of Mulder's head and looked into his eyes "What has that dream done to you...?" she said in a tisk-tisk kind of voice.  
  
Mulder's expression changed from aggravated to sad as he remembered the awful things he saw in his dream. "You died Scully..." he said looking at her with pain in his eyes.  
  
"What are you talking about?"  
  
"In my dream—in my nightmare...you died, you killed yourself. But you didn't leave me...I could still see you...I didn't want you to go...but you faded away."  
  
"Mulder...Mulder...it was just a dream..." Scully said as she put her arms around him.  
  
Surprisingly tears started to fall from his face, "I broke down...I couldn't bear it Scully...I couldn't bear you leaving."  
  
Scully looked into his eyes and with a sincere smile she said, "I'm never going to leave you Mulder...never...even when I'm gone...I'll be right here in your heart. All you have to do is open your eyes and see." She said as she put a hand on his chest by his heart.  
  
Mulder smiled, he had been foolish to let his bad dreams scare him so much. "And I'll live forever in the light that comes from your beautiful eyes."  
  
"Are you aiming at something here?" Scully smiled humorously.  
  
"Only for a moment in heaven."  
  
"Stop flirting with me Mulder, we've got to get to work." Scully said turning and opening the door.  
  
Mulder grabbed her and pulled her close to him. Then he whispered in her ear "Open your eyes..." then he kissed her.  
  
Scully ran her hands up his chest, then said with a happy smile "To what?"  
  
"It's Saturday." Mulder said with a laugh.  
  
"Oh...woops..." Scully said as she realized her absentminded silliness.  
  
Mulder put his hand on her soft face and looked into her eyes, "Seriously Scully you've got to get a calendar or something."  
  
"Shut-up and kiss me Mulder."  
  
TO BE CONTINUED 


	6. Night Sky

True Emotions  
Ch.6  
Night Sky  
  
"Mulder what the hell are we doing out here?" Scully said as she held herself tightly, her warm breath making clouds around her face in the cold evening air.  
  
"You'll see Scully... just come on." Mulder said coaxingly.  
  
"No Mulder! We just spent twelve hours flying out to nowhere Ontario, three hours driving out to the middle of this freezing hell, and another four miles trudging through this snowstorm to God knows where for who knows what! I'm tired and I can't feel any of my limbs!" Scully said angrily as she shivered.  
  
Mulder grabbed her gloved hand and pulled her a little bit, "I'm telling you it's just a few minutes more."  
  
"That's what you said and hour ago Mulder!" she said pulling her hand from him.  
  
"Do you want to turn back now?" Mulder asked her already knowing the answer.  
  
Scully looked back at the snowy forest trail behind them and then looked back at him, "Mulder if I wasn't frozen stiff I would seriously kick you in the balls for doing this to me!"  
  
"Whoa! Down girl, no need to get violent." he laughed.  
  
"Mulder how can you be joking I'm seriously going to get frostbite! What the hell could be so interesting or important?!"  
  
"You've been saying you wanted a break from all the crap we do all the time!" Mulder said as he pulled her along.  
  
"When I said I wanted a break I meant a vacation, not that I want to freeze to death in a God forsaken wasteland!"  
  
Mulder ignored her as he pulled her along but Scully just continued to complain, "What could it possibly be this time Mulder? Flying pigs? No! Wait let me guess, man eating tomatoes! Or even better the abominable snow man!!"  
  
"Scully..." Mulder said as he suddenly stopped and looked into her eyes, "You're no fun when your cold. You get all bitchy!"  
  
"What?! I am not bitchy!" Scully said insulted as they continued.  
  
"You are too!"  
  
"I am not!"  
  
"Well let me correct myself you act like a little pissy girl."  
  
"I do not!"  
  
"Just listen to yourself Scully!" he said as he continued to pull her along in the snow.  
  
Scully was silent for a moment. Then she decided to change the subject, "So where the hell are you taking me?"  
  
"You'll see." He said with a youthful smile.  
  
"Muld—"she said but stopped as they stepped out of the forest and into a huge open meadow. Up in the northern sky was a colorful array of lights dancing above the large snow covered mountains. Scully's breath was taken from her as she looked around the meadow.  
  
One long curved river gurgled past the rocks as it swept down the mountain and between the now snowy, grassy hills. About a dozen deer could be spotted in what was left of the fading light about a two hundred feet away. The sweet, tall pine's gave only added to the lushes smell of the scene.  
  
"Muld..." she tried again. She looked at him with the greatest look of utter surprise he had ever seen. As she did she saw something that she didn't before. Right behind him, to the east side of the meadow was a small log cabin, with smoke rising from the chimney.  
  
"Mulder? What exactly...." She looked at him again "...is this?"  
  
"A friend of mine lives here, he asked if I could watch the place while he was gone over the weekend. This whole meadow is his property and he gets a lot of hunters out here, so he has to chase them off, he said if I had some friends we could hang out there for a while." Mulder paused for a moment as he began to nervously scratch the back of his head "Well you know me...I don't have that many friends."  
  
Scully looked at him suspiciously, "This is a little short notice Mulder...you didn't exactly give me much choice!"  
  
He laughed, "Um actually I did that on purpose."  
  
"What?! Mulder I can't believe you would do this to me!"  
  
"Hey calm down Scully!" he said putting his hands up. "He left one of his truck's and it's only four miles to the next town—"  
  
"Then why the hell did we walk!"  
  
Mulder's smile disappeared as his plans blew up in his face. "I just... wanted to see the look on your face."  
  
Scully began to clam down. "Mulder that's sweet, but what did you expect me to do? Just say sure I'll sleep with you!"  
  
"NO WAY!" Mulder yelled "It's a three bedroom cabin Scully. I just figured this would be a big change from the 'city life.'"  
  
Scully paused for a moment as a smile spread over her face. She looked around at the beautiful scenery. "I can't believe you'd do all this for me..."  
  
"Well..." Mulder admitted with a laugh "Skinner thinks we're on an assignment and this excursion's kind of being funded by the government!"  
  
"What?!" Scully laughed.  
  
"Well anyway, I don't know about you but I'm frozen stiff. Shall we go inside?"  
  
"I don't think I could move if I tried." Scully said still rubbing her arms.  
  
Suddenly Mulder grabbed her hand and dragged her towards the cabin. "Come on Scully...he even made a fire for us!"  
  
* * * * *  
  
Within an hour they had warmed themselves and were standing in the doorway drinking hot coffee looking out into the night sky outside. Scully was wrapped up in a large wool blanket and Mulder was in his coat.  
  
Scully suddenly looked at him and said, "Mulder, you're so crazy!"  
  
Mulder leaned down to whisper something in her ear but all of a sudden a loud howl came from the woods outside. The sudden noise nearly scared Scully to death as she grabbed a hold of him.  
  
"It's only a wolf..." Mulder said as he laid a hand on her head.  
  
Scully smiled as she pulled away, "Silly me. So what were you saying?"  
  
Mulder pretended to think for a second, "Well you said I was crazy...then I leaned in to whisper something...and then you jumped when the wolf howled."  
  
"Yes...but what were you going to say?" Scully asked eagerly.  
  
Mulder put his arms around her and pulled her close. Scully tried to resist for a second as she asked "What are you doing Mulder?!"  
  
He put his mouth only inches from her ear and whispered, "I may be crazy, but I'm crazy about you."  
  
"Mulder!" she said pushing away "We can't do this!"  
  
"What do you mean?! Five days ago you said you loved me."  
  
"That's just the thing! I can't concentrate! I can't stop looking at you! We never should have come here! I keep wanting to do things...Mulder I can't do this anymore!" Scully said frustrated.  
  
Mulder paused for a minute and starred into her eyes then he pulled out some car keys from his pocket. "Here you go Scully. Just head down the road, you'll reach town in about twenty minutes. I'll see you at work on Monday, and don't worry I won't bother you again... we'll just forget the whole thing." He turned away with a sorrowful look, "I'll go to town in the morning and call Skinner and tell them there was no case."  
  
"Mulder..." Scully said regretfully.  
  
"No Scully...I can live with whatever way you feel...if you don't want it to be like this I'll back off. I never should have forced you into this."  
  
* * * * *  
  
Mulder was sitting in the plush chair in front of the fire staring into space when there came knock on the door not even twenty minutes later. Mulder got up lazily and answered it.  
  
Scully stood outside in the freezing night air, tears frozen on her face "Mulder you didn't force me into anything....The truth is I want to be here with you...I'm just scared...scared of what may happen....The truth is that I love how you distract me, I love how you're all I can think of."  
  
By the end of this there were even more tears on her face. Mulder simply pulled her into his arms and stroked her head. "Come inside before you freeze to death." He finally said.  
  
Scully looked up into his big beautiful eyes and whispered, "I'm crazy about you Mulder." She then continued to pull on his shirt so that his face was nearly touching hers, and she kissed him.  
  
Mulder could barely keep back his joyful laughter as he kissed her back. Then he said, "Don't you ever do that to me again, you hear me?"  
  
"We'll neither of us are going anywhere for a while..." Scully said with a laugh.  
  
"Why?!" Mulder asked surprised.  
  
"I crashed the truck!"  
  
They both laughed as they went inside and closed the door. 


	7. In the Moonlight

True Emotions  
Ch.7  
In The Moonlight  
  
"I hate summer!" Scully with agitation as she plopped into the chair next to Mulder's desk.  
  
Mulder simply stared up from the papers he was looking through, as though he was asking without words exactly what she meant.  
  
"I mean look at it Mulder!" she said pointing to the warm sunshine pouring into the basement office. "The sun's shining, the flowers are blooming, the birds are singing, all while we're stuck in this hole of an office! Why do you have to do paperwork anyway? You never used to!"  
  
Mulder looked up at her again without a word. His expression was that of one you'd give a stranger, someone you've never seen in your life who had started chatting with you on the street. After a moment of silence Scully could take it no longer, "What?! You're acting as if you don't know me or something!"  
  
"I thought you wanted me to." He said shortly.  
  
"What?" Scully said surprised by his blank tone.  
  
"You were getting sick of the fact that we never got any work done anymore. You said you couldn't get Skinner of your back from all the time we've been wasting. You told me I should straighten up and act like a man!" he ended with his voice raised.  
  
Scully was rather taken aback by his response. They had gotten into a fight the other night but she hadn't expected him to take her seriously. She had only been in a bad mood after all.  
  
Scully was just about to open her mouth in defense but he stood up suddenly and crossed the room. He proceeded to change the subject as he turned on a projector, and showed her some pictures of recent victims of freak accidents somewhere in Vermont. But Scully hardly heard a word of what he was saying.  
  
"What just happened?" Scully said out loud, interrupting him.  
  
Mulder paused for a moment. He knew he was acting childish but he didn't want to talk about it. Scully just seemed to be pissing him off lately. She never did that before, not recently as least. He opened his mouth to explain but all that came out was "Nothing! We've got work to do. I got us a flight to Vermont at 1:30. I suggest you pack for a few days...I'll see you at the airport around one o'clock."  
  
Scully just stared at him blankly as he stormed out of the office. She let out a long sigh as soon as he was down the hall. All was going to hell now. "I should have known this was too good to be true."  
  
The next day things only got worse as they checked into the motel in the sleepy little town in Vermont. Mulder walked up to the front desk with dreary eyes and a long yawn and said to the young man. "Two rooms please whatever you got."  
  
"Sorry sir we've only got one room left...it's a single." The young man said not even looking up from his car magazine.  
  
"Is there possibly another motel around here that we could go to?" Scully asked hopefully.  
  
The man looked up from his magazine, "In this damn town? No way...but I get off in an hour, I wouldn't mind some company at my place honey."  
  
"Excuse me!" Scully said rather offended.  
  
"We'll take whatever you got." Mulder said shortly grabbing the last pair of keys from the desk and throwing down some cash. "Come on Scully...unless you'd rather go with him!"  
  
He walked off angrily down the hall. Scully followed him, "You think I liked that?! That boy could be my son, that's disgusting!"  
  
"I'll sleep on the floor so you can have the bed. We need you to get your beauty's rest." He said in a teasing tone.  
  
"What is your problem Mulder? It's like you hate me all of a sudden! What did I do?!" Scully nearly ended in tears.  
  
Mulder looked at her for a second then unlocked the door and walked in leaving her in the hall. This didn't sit to well with Scully. "What the hell is your problem?! Why won't you talk to me?! Tell me what's wrong!!"  
  
Mulder stopped in his tracks, his back facing Scully. His arm flinched and he dropped the keys to the floor. Scully held her breath as she waited for him to speak. But he simply sat down on the bed and let out a painful sigh.  
  
"Mulder..." Scully said softly. "I know things can never be perfect between us...but I meant what I said Mulder. I love you...and no matter what I always will...that's why it's hurting me so much to be having these silly fights."  
  
"It's too hard Scully..." Mulder said quietly.  
  
"What do you mean Mulder?"  
  
"It's too hard not to love you."  
  
She walked up to him and knelt down so she could look up into his face. "What are you talking about?" She reached her hand up to his face softly.  
  
He closed his eyes briefly in response. "I feel like the biggest ass in the world. Torturing the best woman in the world, just because I'm having a bad day."  
  
Scully said nothing, but she hoped he would explain... for this had obviously been lasting for more than a day.  
  
"I'm just afraid I've promised you more than I can give Scully. I'm not a strong man, I'm not brave. I'm scared of loosing you every second of the day. I've almost lost you too many times. The closer I get the harder it will be to move on." Mulder said with frustration evident in his voice.  
  
"I've never gone through this either." Scully said seeming to finally understand.  
  
But Mulder was confused about her response. "What are you talking about?"  
  
"When you love someone you're always afraid that they'll suddenly disappear and you'll be left broken. And that can happen to anyone, but the closer you get to someone the more you fear it. Sometimes when you haven't had to deal with it before, nor in your case you've dealt with it more than other's it consumes you." She placed her hands on his face and forced him to look her into the eyes. "But when that happens you've got to remember that you've only got one life, and if you spend it all in fear of death and of other's death then that's hardly a life at all. I can't promise you I'll be with you until the day you die and neither you for me, but I can promise I'll love you till that moment comes. And as long as you love me I'll never really leave you."  
  
"Wow...that was a speech." Mulder said as she finally finished, trying to lighten up the conversation.  
  
"Mulder I'm serious." Scully said agitated by his response.  
  
He looked softly into her eyes. "You're too serious Scully. All I wanted was a kiss and a "hang in there...it'll be okay."" He placed his hand gently on hers, still holding his face close to hers.  
  
The tears of worry finally dripped down her face as she smiled. A wide smile showed on Mulder's face and Scully laughed, "There's the smile I love."  
  
They were inches from each other now and spoke only in whispers. Scully nor Mulder could wait no longer, having not spent five minutes alone for the past five or six weeks their lips touched softly in a passionate kiss. Soaking up all the tears, all the love, all the fears.  
  
Mulder lay back on the bed and Scully placed her head on his chest. As the moonlight shined down into the room from the window Scully fell asleep in his warm arms the smell of him wafting her to sleep. Mulder didn't close his eyes all night just watched her peacefully and ran his fingers through her fiery orange hair. By the time the moonlight faded and the sun started to raise his eyelids finally got heavy and the sweet smell of her hair was calling for him to sleep.  
  
The sunlight peaked in through the window and shown upon the room. Both Mulder and Scully were silently dreaming, the door wide open, the bags still out in the hall, and the keys on the floor. 


	8. Bittersweet Tears

True Emotions

Ch. 8

Bittersweet Tears

Scully awoke to the golden rays of sunshine pouring in through window and the sound of the busy street outside her apartment window. She rolled over in her blankets lazily and tried to block out the sound of the world by stuffing her head under her pillows. She had been having a wonderful dream and all she wanted was to go back to sleep and continue it.

In it she had been lying in bed, Mulder's arms wrapped around her tightly, and his soft voice whispering in her ear. But his words were not comforting, not as they had been the first time. Presently tears welled up in Scully's eyes as she lay in bed dreaming of her lost love. The memory of his face, his voice, the pictures scattered all over his bed, it all brought sorrow to her heart.

She sat up slowly, and pulled her messy hair behind her ears. She had been too tired and miserable to care for it the night before. After a moment of staring out the window she decided that the only way to keep him off her mind was to go into work and stay busy. She stepped out of bed, her wrinkled pajamas hanging sloppily from her aching body.

Before she even went three feet she put a hand to her mouth and ran into the bathroom. As she sat beside the toilet she nearly gave up and decided to call in sick, Skinner would just tell her to go home and rest anyway, for he was just as upset, he had been there when it had happened.

But something wouldn't let her give up, the hope that Mulder could still be alive somewhere, wouldn't let her give into her weakness. She stood up and wiped her mouth with a towel and looked into the bathroom mirror. She saw a stranger looking back at her, a woman lost and scared, a woman whose hopes and dreams were gone forever.

She looked down at her stomach with a weak smile, trying to hold back the tears. "Mulder we can't get through this without you."

Scully walked down the main floor's hallway with a blank stare on her face. She was just counting the seconds until she would make it down the elevator and into their office. But she didn't know how this would help her, she would only see the chair he used to sit in, the pencils still hanging from the ceiling, the posters and news clippings pinned on the wall. She would just have to look through file after file of their many cases together and remember his silly predictions and crazy beliefs that always turned out to be right in some insane way.

But before she made it to the elevator she was stopped by Skinner. "Agent Scully!"

She turned and tried with all her might to put on a realistic looking smile, "Good morning, Skinner. Yes?"

"Are you feeling any better?" he asked with great concern evident in his face. "What did they say at the hospital?"

The two entered the elevator, coincidentally alone, and Skinner said in slightly lower voice as he pushed the button for it to go up to his floor instead of to the basement, "Did the doctor say if it's okay or not?"

Scully was surprised by his odd behavior but she appreciated that he respected her privacy, "Yes Skinner the baby's going to be just fine."

"I'm so sorry Scully…" he said oddly after a moment, not quite sure of what else to say as there came a silence. "…I just wish there was something I could have done to stop it."

Scully gave out a sigh of relief as the elevator doors opened. It would have been an odd scene to see, for both of them stepped out of it teary eyed. But as Scully turned around, realizing she was on the wrong floor, Skinner stopped her.

"No, you need to go this way. They've got some questions for you and I."

"Who?"

"The team investigating into Mulder's disappearance, we're the top suspects in their case."

"They actually think that we're involved in his disappearance?!"

Skinner didn't say anything, but he didn't have to for Scully was quite used to being blamed ridiculously for something she didn't do. She said nothing more as well for it brought back a wrenching pain in her heart remembering his face again.

But then again the memory of his smiling face was the only thing that had gotten her through these past few nights, and she imagined they'd have to get her through many more. But what she feared the most was that she depended on him too much to be able to let him go.

Scully slammed her apartment door shut as she finally got home late that day. It was all too much for her. First Mulder's disappearance, then her mysterious pregnancy, and now she had to deal with a son of a bitch partner who thought he knew Mulder more than she did!

"I spent the last seven years of my life with the man! I lived and breathed for him for Pete's sake!" she nearly screamed at her reflection. "It's not like that, he's not like that! They did this to him! He didn't do this!"

She sat down miserably on her bed. Today was only one day, what was tomorrow going to be like? How would she ever get through the next week or month without him? How was she ever going to find him if they wouldn't listen to her? How could she ever feel his arms around her, comforting her, if they left him to die? But even if she could somehow get them to see, what could they do anyway?

"What's the use?!" she suddenly screamed in despair. She lay down on the bed and stared off into space, and in a quiet voice she whispered to him longingly, "Where are you Mulder?"

TO BE CONTINUED


	9. chx

Sorry this story has been discontinued.

A New Story

"X-13: Last Chance"

Will replace the following stories:

The X-files Movie 2

Truth Search

True Emotions

X-13 shall incorporate any part of the above stories if and only if you send me an email! See my bio page for my email address!


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